(I wish there was a gentle smile smilie...)
I hope you are all doing well.
We had a really late night last night. Josh was a bit wired, and his hyper attitude was infectious I suppose. We talked until... well it was after 3, we'll just say that. (Thank God for Labor Day, right?) Uncovered more in an area of me that I'm painfully (not because of Josh!) learning I even have. I'll delve more into that in a minute. Because I was up pretty late, and its delightfully dark in our room and very quiet... well I slept in. Okay, so all that was really an excuse. I just plain slept in. I got up about an hour ago. And it felt wonderful. lol. And then I got some stuff together, cleaned up in the bathroom, emptied all the trash cans, and just tidied.
And now I'm sitting in the living room. I'm feeling very peaceful. I have Flyleaf's "Supernatural" acoustic version playing over and over on the speakers. I'm hoping to learn it well enough to sing it soon. The coffeepot, while not holding "hot" coffee (just cold,) is glowing nicely in the corner. And its just peaceful. I am planning on trying to have these quiet times in the mornings, before Josh gets up. Not because he is a deterrent to them, but because I normally wake up before him and it seemed a good use of my time. So the "planning" to do it, probably has helped my peaceful frame of mind.
I've been married for 17 days now. I can't really comprehend that. Last night I kept looking at Josh, thinking to myself, "He's my husband. That wonderful, handsome man, he's mine. And I'm his wife. We are married!" Ha, so it's still sinking in, yet I don't feel like I'm sinking. :-P
I'm already learning how I'm not the world's best wife, or the most easy to live with. But Josh is totally full of love and doesn't sit and fuss about it or put me down.
Its amazing how your heart changes and you want to be the very best for another person.
Also, more and more, I'm seeing the only way to do that, is to fall more deeply in love with Jesus. Josh and I are far from "perfect" Christians, but Jesus says we are saints to Him and righteous, right? Our honest, true desire, is to have Him at the center of our life. And that's far from easy, because our "dark" side, definitely rebels. But it is our heart, our main passion.
Change of subject, how does one deal with fear? I've learned a lot about myself, over the past couple weeks, when Josh and I are laying in bed at night, doing the couple thing and talking. (and the "couple thing" I'm referring to is the talking. :-p)
Anyway, while doing that, we've discovered I'm an extremely fearful person. And a control freak, when it comes to my body at least. Josh's answer, and as short as it is, shows his wisdom. "Don't be afraid. Just don't." I answered that surely it couldn't be that easy. But the more I thought about it, the Bible says "Do not fret." Not "Remove fear." Not "Do this and you will have no fear." Not "pray this." Just "Do not fret."
So I'm on a mission to not be afraid. Pray. lol. And if anyone knows some good verses to remember or something that helps them, PLEASE TELL ME.
I'm not really in the mood to blog about the wedding right now, but I'll sit down with Josh sometime and we'll write down our thoughts on it. :-) And I'll post a picture slide show or something and a link to the video. :-) Ha, I just realized, we'll have a guest next time then! Boy, that sounds like some sort of event that would happen in a well read blog. Okay, ha, back to typing about the wedding...
I will say this, it was beautiful. The wedding of our dreams.
So, I'm going to sign off of here now. I'll keep you all updated on the findings of fearlessness.
Oh, since many read this on there, I'm not going to be on Facebook for a while... until Sept. 21st actually. So if you want to comment on a blog, go ahead, I'll read it when I get back. Or you can post something on the actual blog site, which is http://simpaticosity.blogspot.com/. And if you have something really important to tell me, call or send me a text or if you can't do either, send me a message on Facebook and Josh will tell me about it.
I love you all!
Mrs. Christa Edmonds
i'm actually finding that i enjoy cooking. matt is so nice, so full of compliments, that it just makes it so fun! not that i want to cook all day every day... bleh. :)
and btw, matt was the one who gave me the third column for my blog, so i have no idea how to do that. and all the pictures except one were taken by either mine or matt's camera.
i so wish i woke up before matt! but alas i find myself sleeping in until 10 or so. i'm so lazy these days. but technically, we're on our honeymoon until tomorrow... so... ;)
Hey Christa, I know you're not far away right now...but...I just wanted to comment on your latest post. I totally know where you are coming from. I am from the same place as you and when I left to go overseas, there was A LOT of fear...I mean A LOT! (Side note....I'm very happy that you are so peaceful....)
Back to the subject now...When I was overseas, I was afraid of everything. Over the course of a few years, I learned to trust...trust God, Mark, myself....I had a very low self esteem back then. Mark helped me understand that I had a lot more to offer than I gave myself credit for. Anyway, I'd love to talk to you more about it but I just wanted to share a verse or maybe two with you that helped me.
PS 4:8 I will lie down and sleep in peace,for you alone, O LORD,
make me dwell in safety.
PS 5:11-12 But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy.
Spread your protection over them,
that those who love your name may rejoice in you.
For surely, O LORD, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield.
PS 20:7 Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.
PS 27:1 The LORD is my light and my salvation--whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life--of whom shall I be afraid?
PS 56:3 When I am afraid, I will trust in you.
Also, Psalm 91
Love you!
Ok HI!